I loved him the most in my life. He was the most handsome person in this world, he had the perfect combination of merit, knowledge and kindness. I could never think of anyone else as my role model except him. We had the longest relationship, since I was born..Yes, I am talking about my father. To almost every girl her father is the most lovable person in her life. She knows that he would not hurt her even if her boy friend or husband does.
And I lost him...I still cannot believe this, and it hurts to say he 'was', not he 'is'...I could never imagine I will face the biggest loss in my life so early. And I could not even see his face in last 1.5 years...I was waiting so eagerly to visit home once I settle down everything with my grad school...I wanted to see him smiling proudly but I could not even say him a proper goodbye...I become squeezed in terrible fear each time I look back to March 19th night...I still do not know how did I pass those couple of days. Flying from Japan with this unbearable shock and pain, facing the most difficult situation in my life...how could I even say goodbye to a person who was healthy before a day and went for his work?
We all take our parents for granted. We are used to seeing so many people dying around world everyday, but can we ever think for a single moment that this can happen anytime with the person we love the most?
I have changed a lot after my father left me alone...I have learnt that this world is full of fake people...And I have learnt that no one, absolutely no one except your own family member will ever know what is going inside you...No one can imagine that I feel like a paralyzed person, as if someone cut me into half...the emptiness inside me cannot be fulfilled by anything else in this world...How would it be? When I want to talk to him badly can anything else take away that depression?
People say that time heals everything...but I know this wound will be fresh forever....
Now I feel guilty that I have been away from home for 5 years...only if I knew something like this might happen in next 5 years I would have done my best to keep in alive...I only wish I could get back him only once....Death is surely the most terrible thing we can ever face...
I love you baba...And I only wish you stay well in heaven..please come to see me sometimes..I feel terribly lonely without you...I want to hear your voice..could you please come to my dream tonight? ..... :-(
And I lost him...I still cannot believe this, and it hurts to say he 'was', not he 'is'...I could never imagine I will face the biggest loss in my life so early. And I could not even see his face in last 1.5 years...I was waiting so eagerly to visit home once I settle down everything with my grad school...I wanted to see him smiling proudly but I could not even say him a proper goodbye...I become squeezed in terrible fear each time I look back to March 19th night...I still do not know how did I pass those couple of days. Flying from Japan with this unbearable shock and pain, facing the most difficult situation in my life...how could I even say goodbye to a person who was healthy before a day and went for his work?
We all take our parents for granted. We are used to seeing so many people dying around world everyday, but can we ever think for a single moment that this can happen anytime with the person we love the most?
I have changed a lot after my father left me alone...I have learnt that this world is full of fake people...And I have learnt that no one, absolutely no one except your own family member will ever know what is going inside you...No one can imagine that I feel like a paralyzed person, as if someone cut me into half...the emptiness inside me cannot be fulfilled by anything else in this world...How would it be? When I want to talk to him badly can anything else take away that depression?
People say that time heals everything...but I know this wound will be fresh forever....
Now I feel guilty that I have been away from home for 5 years...only if I knew something like this might happen in next 5 years I would have done my best to keep in alive...I only wish I could get back him only once....Death is surely the most terrible thing we can ever face...
I love you baba...And I only wish you stay well in heaven..please come to see me sometimes..I feel terribly lonely without you...I want to hear your voice..could you please come to my dream tonight? ..... :-(
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