The Transition-1

A question that I am commonly asked by people I meet for the first time is, why did I choose to study in Japan? And I guess I never gave the proper answer to anyone! Well, I came up with a standard answer over time (cause you know you don't always have the power to make up instant stories!). But at this point of transition, when I am taking another big step of life, I guess I have figured out why I left home in 2009. And this story is for those who might be considering moving to/ studying in Japan. It's true that not everyone will have the same experiences but this might give a little insight of how is it to live in a country like Japan for 5 years.

Looking back...
Stable and secured life probably never attracted me. Like many other challenge loving persons I was always enchanted by the mystery of unknown and test my ability and patience by choosing a rather arduous path. And that is one of the reasons along others why I decided to move to Japan.
Back home I had a pretty much perfect life (well, there is nothing called "perfect life" but it was not bad at all), I just got into my dream institute BUET at the Department of Architecture. I was topping in class and already started to dream of future me as an architect. We moved to our new beautiful house and I had my own room where I could work all day and night. It was not easy to take that much of workload, but its never easy for students of Architecture in any country in this world.
But one of the factors that was not under my control was the political turmoil in our country. The university would often close down because of it and that caused session jam. Students could not graduate when they are supposed to, 5 years Architecture course would often take 6-7 years. We were always little concerned about that, and that's when I got to know about MEXT (Monbusho) Scholarship of Japan.
Later I applied for the scholarship, passed the first selection and was accepted to sit for written exam. I also managed to pass the written exam though I thought my exam was terrible and finally went through the interview. And I got chosen as one of the 3 students (in my program) for the scholarship.

But it's never easy to leave everything behind, your home, family, friends... The reasons why I chose to go to Japan were-

• I might lose extra years for session jam if I stay in my country, so even if I have to spend one extra year to learn Japanese its ok, cause I am actually investing my time for learning something new, something I can treasure.
• Since I will be fully supported by scholarship I will learn to live independently. Though it does not cost much (almost zero) to study at public institutions in Bangladesh, I never wanted to depend financially on my parents. 
• Most importantly I will be able to broaden my perspective by mixing with international community, learn about unique cultures and be able to gain more knowledge about Japan and other countries.

So on April 2nd, 2009 I left home for Japan. I still remember my first morning in Tokyo. Chilly breeze with warm sunshine of early spring, high rise buildings at Shinjuku, white and pink cherry trees - I fell in love with Japan at the first place and I loved Japan more each day till August 14th, 2014 when I left.
It's true that there is no perfect place to live on this earth. But I would say Japanese people has taken it pretty close to ultimate perfection. I learnt to appreciate nature and beauty more, learnt to be more punctual and be attentive to details while my stay in Japan.
But there are always compromises, things that you will lose to achieve something. I have those too, but I won't probably regret spending the most of my youth in Japan. And if you are open to learning a new language and culture, you won't regret as well.

I am writing this post from USA where I'm going through my second great transitional period of life, meeting new people, having new experiences everyday. But I will leave those stories for next post.

Before that, here are some (interesting) facts/incidents from my early days in Japan!

• My friends used to think Japanese people eat only raw fish, which is not true. They have varieties of simple and healthy food. And unlike many friends of mine I loved Sushi and Sashimi from the very first time!
• I heard skirt was first invented for male population but I saw a guy wearing skirt for the first time in Tokyo. 
• Japanese people are really kind and generous. Once I went to supermarket and saw an old person dropped the egg box she bought while leaving. But the store assistant came running and exchanged that for a new box of egg for free.
• Japanese people are also very honest. If you lose something somewhere you are more likely to find it back. One of my friend forgot his iPhone at restaurant once but it was right there when he went back after hours.
• Japanese people don't use English or other foreign language much but they will never make fun of your broken Japanese. They will always listen to you carefully, try to understand what you are trying to convey and tell you "Sugoi ne" (Wow! You're brilliant!)

I guess these stories will never end. But this is all for today.
日本大好き！

Beautiful Hydrangeas!

Hydrangea, アジサイ(Ajisai) in Japanese is one of my most favorite flowers. Generally common in East Asia (Japan, China, Korea), Indonesia and America, varieties of colors are mostly seen in East Asian countries.
Hydrangeas look like flower balls and come in different beautiful colors and shades, blue, white, pink. I did not have the chance to see these flowers before coming to Japan and I absolutely fell in love when I saw them the first time on 2009 at Nagano.
This note is pending from last year. I wanted to write this note before as I also took lots of photos then but could not finish writing. This year the Ajisais are almost dying, so I thought I would not be able to take any photos this year cause I had been extremely busy with different stuffs. But before few days I had the chance to go to Hitachi Seaside Park with my friend and there were still lots of flowers in bloom. Not only there were many varieties of colors, but also Hydrangeas of different flower arrangements. So I am going to share some photos here today. Hope you like it! ^-^

Finding Financial Aid for International Students in Japan

I just thought that I should write a note on how to find financial aid or scholarships in Japan while I am here, so that if anyone who is searching for such information can refer to this. Here I will write about the names of important scholarship foundations, time to apply, scholarship rate etc.

So there is a good number of scholarships given to international students in Japan, while the range of scholarship rate varies from bachelor students to graduate students, it also depend on the scholarship foundation. Of course the bigger scholarships are harder to get, the percentage is often 1~2%. But if here is the tricky part, in case of private scholarships, if you get a small one, like less than 50000 yen/month (app. 500USD) then you can apply for another small scholarship. But if you receive the big ones like 100000 yen/month (app. 1000USD) then you have to be satisfied with that.

There are two types of scholarships, Government one and private scholarships.
1. MEXT Scholarship provided by Japan Government which is the best option to study in Japan and you get paid the most. Though the rate is decreasing every year, I have received around 1200USD per month on average for 5 years for my total bachelor course, including one year in language school. And that amount is paid mainly for living expense. Government pays your tuition fee, so you would not have to worry about school fees. Of course graduate students receive higher amount, increasing from Masters to Post Doc. You can apply for extension when you finish your course and want to continue studying. If you have a really good grade, recommendation and your research plan is outstanding then you might receive extension.
For MEXT, usually people have to apply when they are in their home country. Here's the page:
http://www.mext.go.jp/a_menu/koutou/ryugaku/boshu/1319066.htm

2. Honjo Scholarship is one of the biggest private scholarships given to graduate students, mainly to PhD students. It is extremely hard to receive this scholarship unless your research is extraordinary and contributing greatly to society. The amount is around 2000USD (1 USD = 100yen) per month.
http://hisf.or.jp/english/

3. Ito Scholarship is also pretty big. The monthly allowance is 1800USD (1USD = 100yen) and is given to 10 students only.
http://www2.itofound.or.jp/schoalarship-program/scholarship-fs-d/about-program

4. Sato Yo International Scholarship pays the similar amount as Io foundation. They recruit scholarship students twice a year. For each time they recruit around 6~8 students, totaling to around 15 students per year. The scholarship is open to both bachelor and graduate students, though the amount is higher for graduate students. Here's the link:
http://www.sisf.or.jp/

5. Tokyu Scholarship is the next big one after Sato and Ito. They pay around 1600USD per month for 2 years and recruit around 15 students per year.
http://www.tokyu-f.jp/

Other than these there are other smaller scholarships like,

6. Nitori Scholarship which pays around 1100USD per month. And they recruit a lot of students but their total recruitment procedure is less inclined to research work and more towards office job. Students receiving scholarship also has to do part time for certain number of hours as a condition of receiving scholarship. It is open for both undergraduate and graduate students.
http://www.nitori-shougakuzaidan.com/

There are many other scholarships, sometimes only recommended from university, like Rotary scholarship or Kyoritsu International Scholarship and the amounts vary. More information about scholarship can be received from international students office at each university. For example, University of Tsukuba's International Student Office's website regularly update about scholarship news. Application time varies depending on scholarship foundation but the earliest one is around late October to receive scholarship from next year April. The total procedure consists of 2~4 steps including document check and couple of interviews.

Hope this information was helpful. Best of luck! :)

First birthday without my dad

3rd May 2012

2 days before my birthday. I received call from home around 11'o clock of night that my father was hospitalised in emergency and needs operation. I do not exactly know the medical term but there was something like a tumour in his stomach which got burst and the poison was getting mixed in his blood.
I remember that night very well. I had classes the whole day and had to submit some report the following day. But I could not sleep the whole night, shivering in fear, feeling the urge to run home right at that moment...

4th May 2012

The operation went successfully in the evening and I started to feel like the most dangerous risk in my life just passed away very closely. And I was waiting eagerly to hear my father's voice again when he wakes up.

5th May 2012

It was my birthday. I called baba, his voice was weak but he wished me happy birthday and gave me his blessings. That was one of my best birthdays ever and I felt that nothing could make me happier than my father's sweet voice. Walking back to home with full moon in the sky smiling back at me, I felt life is beautiful!

But could I ever imagine that I will have to spend the same day after two years without his presence?

4th May 2014

It's my birthday tomorrow but I was not feeling anything inside for the first time in my life. Rather I was preparing my nerves to tolerate the pain that I won't get to hear my father's voice and the cruel reality will slap my face badly.

5th May 2014

Woke up with some birthday wishes from my close friends and my sister. I did not tell anyone about this day and I am off from all kinds of social networks now, those virtual wishes piss me off these days.
My mom had to rush to complete some official works and almost forgot the date. I gave her routine call when she remembered that it was my birthday. Strange enough, I did not feel bad at all. I felt like I do not want hear these words from anyone else as my father's voice echoed in my brain continually.
It rained a lot that day, I wished the rain wash away my tears and pour me with my father's blessings from heaven.

These days I just try to keep myself busy with everything, get dead tired at the end of the day, sleep and follow the same cycle. I do not want to be free for a single moment cause that's the moment I feel most depressed...
In today's world we hear news of people dying everywhere, but we always think that our parents will be with us. Do we ever think for a single moment that we have to celebrate our birthdays without those precious persons who gave birth to us?

Sad but true that life showed me the hardest thing at very early stage of my life, and it did not care enough to show the reasons. I have realized again how fragile we are...today I AM here but the next moment people might say I WAS here. I feel like a mentally paralyzed person who will never me able to think normally like 10 other people. But my birthday resolution is I will work hard till the end and will make my father happy and proud, cause I love to see him smile.

Sakura at Tsukuba University - A Piece of Heaven on Earth

Though I am pretty late and the sakura has left already but I gotta write this pending post.

I just found that I have not written any post on my university despite of the fact that I absolutely LOVE this place. University of Tsukuba has the largest single campus in Japan and anyone who loves nature will instantly fall in love with this place (like I did). I remember one of my friends who visited from Tokyo said that this place has got too much green! Tsukuba is not that far from Tokyo; if you get into the rapid train of Tsukuba Express then you will reach Tokyo's Akihabara station in less than an hour. But this place is a much better one to live, especially for students. Cause I don't have to get into rush hour trains to go to school, it is very beautiful and peaceful here and it has got the perfect combination of urban and rural characteristics.

So let's get back to the sakura (cherry blossom) talk. This year the weather had been really nice compared to last year as it rained a lot during that time. And we got the news that it will bloom earlier this year because of heavy snowfall. There is a scientific explanation that the cold temperature caused by snow wakes up the flower buds early. I still have to read the scientific paper to understand the mechanism.

I was waiting eagerly for spring this year, thought I will visit all the beautiful places as this could be my last year in Japan. Then everything was scattered in my life in a single night. When I came back to Japan on 4th night I saw the cherry petals floating in the air and lots of petals on the road. Then I was dead tired and jet lagged till the next day and the following day it rained. So I thought there is no chance that I will be able to see cherry blossom this year. But to tell the truth I did not feel that urge either...

But probably we were meant to meet!
After my father left I got very sick from the panic and shock. For unknown reason I used to get chest pains and it started to occur very frequently. I tried to stay calm as much as possible but nothing helped..I could not sleep at all and I also had severe chest pain while my journey back. So after coming back to Japan my mom and sister kept telling me everyday to visit doctor. I did not feel better as the days passed, so when I got some free time on the day before my class started I went to visit the health center of university for the first time.
And that is when I found this small piece of heaven on earth! The place is near Amakubo Ike (pond) at our campus, on the opposite side of Art faculty（筑波大学 体育芸術専門）.

There was pink and white sakuras, lovely flower petals were beneath my feet and touched my face while floating in the air. Mild breeze touched my hair and late afternoon sunshine touched my face. I have seen many beautiful places in last 5 years, but the difference with other places in Tokyo is, no one is fighting to get a place under sakura tree for hanami, only few students sitting here and there, chatting, singing. I also found a place by the pond and felt that our lives are same as these flowers, with different time span...nothing will last forever but as long as we are alive we should give our best and make full use of our time. Someone said that it doesn't matter how many years you were alive but what matters is how many years you live after you leave this earth. That afternoon was not very long but the image will stay in my mind for a long time as it helped to relief my bereaved soul. I also wrote a letter to my dad thinking that he is doing well in a much beautiful place than this.
Sharing some more photos of that beautiful  place :)

Losing the person you love the most..

I loved him the most in my life. He was the most handsome person in this world, he had the perfect combination of merit, knowledge and kindness. I could never think of anyone else as my role model except him. We had the longest relationship, since I was born..Yes, I am talking about my father. To almost every girl her father is the most lovable person in her life. She knows that he would not hurt her even if her boy friend or husband does.
And I lost him...I still cannot believe this, and it hurts to say he 'was', not he 'is'...I could never imagine I will face the biggest loss in my life so early. And I could not even see his face in last 1.5 years...I was waiting so eagerly to visit home once I settle down everything with my grad school...I wanted to see him smiling proudly but I could not even say him a proper goodbye...I become squeezed in terrible fear each time I look back to March 19th night...I still do not know how did I pass those couple of days. Flying from Japan with this unbearable shock and pain, facing the most difficult situation in my life...how could I even say goodbye to a person who was healthy before a day and went for his work?

We all take our parents for granted. We are used to seeing so many people dying around world everyday, but can we ever think for a single moment that this can happen anytime with the person we love the most?

I have changed a lot after my father left me alone...I have learnt that this world is full of fake people...And I have learnt that no one, absolutely no one except your own family member will ever know what is going inside you...No one can imagine that I feel like a paralyzed person, as if someone cut me into half...the emptiness inside me cannot be fulfilled by anything else in this world...How would it be? When I want to talk to him badly can anything else take away that depression?
People say that time heals everything...but I know this wound will be fresh forever....

Now I feel guilty that I have been away from home for 5 years...only if I knew something like this might happen in next 5 years I would have done my best to keep in alive...I only wish I could get back him only once....Death is surely the most terrible thing we can ever face...

I love you baba...And I only wish you stay well in heaven..please come to see me sometimes..I feel terribly lonely without you...I want to hear your voice..could you please come to my dream tonight? ..... :-(

Please come back....

Undomestic Goddess and my thought

I just finished Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella last night! :D

I should not have touched the book at the very first time cause I know when I start any book by her that's the end of my day and I would not be able to sleep until I finish the book. Her books are like magnet! When I start reading I can't stop, I'm reading while eating, reading while walking, and last night I was awake the whole night and finally slept at 7 of morning! :p

So the book very thrilling. By the main character Samantha I can see myself, how being a careerist turns me into robot sometimes. But I have felt a little bit of extremity in her behavior. In real life Samanthas like her would be little more pragmatic if she has an IQ of 158. But it's novel and it is supposed to be dramatic anyway. 

The best thing I have learnt from the book is, however important career can be to us, it cannot buy us personal happiness. I personally would not go after a career which would ask me to wring out all the fun and love from my life. The book just reminded me those feelings again. When Samantha and Nathaniel walked along the countryside roads I could feel that for real and I knew that it's really the most important thing in our life - love! But of course real life is not that easy and I would prefer to try my best to keep balance.

After reading these awesome books -

Undomestic Goddess

Can you keep a secret?

Shopaholic Takes Manhattan

Shopaholic Ties the Knot,

Next on my list are-

Confessions of a Shopaholic and Twenties Girls :) 

But I have to make sure not to touch those books until I am done with my important works! (fingers crossed :p)

Another fantastic book I have been reading is Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely. I will write on that after I finish reading the whole book. But so far I have read I am really impressed and I would highly recommend this to everyone! :)

Messenger of Spring - Plum Festival at Hakone (箱根梅まつり)

So I have not been writing for a long time here, cause I was tired of writing for last 6 months. All those AW essays for GRE, short essays for TOEFL, my research paper, then all those SoPs and personal statements for grad schools....Gosh..I had few things to write about in my head. But then I was just tired of all these...
Then when we were kind of done with all these, me and my boy friend promised each other that we will have a day off when we won't think about career stuffs, studies and just hang around happily! Well, we realized that we did not travel anywhere except our cities in last three years, we were totally buried under all sorts of exams human being can probably have! So it was the perfect time to take a break!
It was funny that we had not been to Hakone in these 5 years of living in Japan though it is one of the famous tourist spots which is very close to Tokyo. So on 19th February we headed off for Hakone. Though there was the terrible snowfall on 15th in Japan and things did not get better by then, but we did not let us stop our awaited date!
We were really excited after reaching Hakone, it was lovely small city where you can stay away from hubbubs of city life and walk peacefully holding warm hands of each other :) Well, Hakone is actually pretty warmer than where I live and the plum flowers were already in full bloom at some places. I had pre-planned to visit the plum garden. Though later we found lots of attractive spots where we wanted to go but thanks to the snow, all routes were closed except train. So we decided that we will go to the rest of the places next time and go with the previous plan.
The plum garden of Hakone was not the best I have seen but still covers a huge area and was very pretty. It was a little cloudy day, so Mount Fuji could not be seen well. But I could spot it for a while and I was happy with that; well I had to be, to my bad luck I never get to see this beauty properly :-(
It was good day over all. Got to meet some sweet people over there.One granny offered us some free appetizers, another grandpa offered us to taste free oranges and a nice guy offered to take a couple picture for us :) And one more thing, the food! I would not forget the special Tofu I had there, it's the best Tofu I have ever had!! At least I will go back again for to taste that! :p
So I am sharing some pictures here from Hakone Ume Matsuri (Plum Festival), hope you will like!
Cheers!